Thursday, March 20, 2008

Move!

Last night, I sat alone in a bar for about an hour. I didn’t mind.

I had an almost full pack of yosi and free drinks so I figured that it was the best time to sort out some of the riotous thoughts and emotions I had for the past days.

It was the night after I chatted with a friend that started out simply enough with “bz ka friend?” and turned into a great two-hour chat. Somewhere between talking about blogging to possible future projects, I told him that I’m moving on.

Too many times we’ve said it. Maybe the same many times we’ve been told. “Move on.”

We know what we mean by moving on – moving on. We also know where we want to be – anywhere but here. We also usually know the when – once it starts hurting like hell and there’s really no way to turn it around. As for the why, it is oftentimes because you’ll be a complete idiot if you don’t.

Somehow though, we usually miss out on the “how”.

There should be a roadmap to moving on. I’ve been in this situation before so I should know how. I’ve done it and I should be able to do it again.

But it’s actually the tricky part. Each situation is different from the other. It’s not like the path from home to work that I can take even with my eyes closed.

I don’t have anything profound to say about how this one will be done.

All I know is that it is the reality. And there’s nothing profound about reality. It just has to be studied, confronted and changed if possible.

So I thought about it, drafted some kind of a mental plan to face it and decided that if the change in reality that I want is not possible, I’ll be fairly satisfied with how things will turn out once I get there.

While puffing like a chimney and drinking like there’s no tomorrow by my own merry self, I realized that it is not aloneness that sucks. It is getting stuck. Like everybody is moving, things are happening and you are left out. I guess, it is where the feeling of aloneness comes from.

Brandi Carlile was wrong she when said that “alone is the last place I wanted to be”. Immobility is. And I definitely don’t want to be there.

Sorry if I can’t tell the details of how I’ll move on. But after an hour and my friends came, it started.

25 comments:

Anonymous said...

we pretend that there is a formula and that we know it. but in reality, we just go on with our life. then one day, magigising ka na lang na di mo na sya iniisip. ending na pala yun ng moving on.

and drama no? pwes, pakilipat sa disney channel pls.

Kiks said...

tama ang inks. although minsan, malaki ang naitutulong ng cardio - you get to think of something else habang nagpapawis ka.

gusto ko sa e!

Coldman said...

sabi nga nila time heals.

hope you're okay now. =)

Anonymous said...

beer and yosi. always the best way to move on. walang profound profound keme. moving on will always be a bitch but it will happen.

Anonymous said...

nakikichismis lang... balita ko winner ang dimsum binge ninyo ni ser.

ram (ang inday ni ser)

Anonymous said...

@gibo: there is that. i should get tips form you .. haha
@kiks: oo nga. healthy pa!
@coldman: yeah I am. always naman. may emo moments lang hehe
@pat: it is and it will ;)
@ram: kilala yata kita inday? haha. sabihin mo sa ser mo, nabitin pa rin ako sa dimsum. nag-take out pa sana ako ng tsa siew kung hindi lang ako nahiya... haha

kawadjan said...

feeling ko breaking up is a lot easier. paano makalimot, yan ang pinakamasaklap.

btw, profound ang post na itez. i love.

Anonymous said...

i agree with giboinks. we just move on and get on with it. nag drama din ako nung nag-asawa jowawitz ko, may i cry mag isa nag bar magisa para lang ba mag emote pero ngayon wala na. funny, kung kelan ko nakalimutan tsaka nag teks at gusto akong makita. grrr

chase / chubz said...

from the words of the great philosphers.. ren & stimpy

happy, happy, joy, joy
happy happy joy.
happy happy happy happy
happy happy
joy joy joy!!!!

:)

Anonymous said...

hay.. yun lang nasabi ko..

sana maging okay ka na..

Pahabol: sorry kung ngayon ko lang nabisita blog mo.. nagkomento ka dati sa luma kong blog ang tanginang alien.. hehehe..

Anonymous said...

@kawadjan: mas madali rin ang break up kesa bumuo ng relasyon..;)
@reynz: dapat nag-text back ka "who's this?"
@chase: ba't hindi namin yan pinag-aralan nung college? hehe
@ferbert: ok na ok. tangina! haha

Diablo said...

i'll pray for u dude... always take care.

mrs.j said...

kamusta ka na?!

wanderingcommuter said...

ang lungkot naman nun....haaay, napa buntong hininga na lang ako.

Anonymous said...

@carl: thanks!
@mrs. j: feeling great most of the time ;)
@wandering: ba't ikaw nalungkot ... ako .. hindi gaano .. hehe

. said...

While puffing like a chimney and drinking like there’s no tomorrow by my own merry self, I realized that it is not aloneness that sucks. It is getting stuck. Like everybody is moving, things are happening and you are left out. I guess, it is where the feeling of aloneness comes from.

---

You hit the spot. Galing.

Abou said...

when do u let go and when do you hold on? moving on may be an inevitable thing that lurks, waiting. but getting stuck together amidst the chaos of everyday life would always be a better happening.

villa214 said...

Try reading devotionals or self-help books. They helped me alot when I was stuck and can't move on.

Anonymous said...

and you didn't even say a word...i was in the middle of a movement na pala. hehehe. gud luck :)---philip

Anonymous said...

@mugen: thanks. lasing lang ako nun. hehe
@abou: always the question
@villa: thanks. i's still ok most of the time ;)
@philip: o devah, hindi halata ... haha

Gayzha said...

I totally feel you... being in the gut and feeling stale myself! Yes, we need to reinvent ourselves just like Madonna, ching!

getsba said...

haaay! i can very well relate...i've been carved in this desk for 15 years! You're right - getting stuck sucks. Haynaku, sabi nga ng ate kong matanda, bakit nauuso ang "move on" at laging may ka-partner itong "closure"?

cant_u_read said...

haaaaaaaaaaaaay!

yun lang. hay.

Anonymous said...

@gayzha: Madonna talaga!
@getsba: haha. gusto ko last line mo!
@ryeness: tapos na ako sa haaaay friend. I think... hehe

Unknown said...

u r moving on?..waaaahahaha!pareho tau!..go go go!move on!hahaha!